I Lack Of Smiles

You dare tell me to smile –when they and I can’t reconcile!

Because the others don’t see me as one of their brothers

But rather something that they soak and clean in lather

My soul fits in a bowl of shame

My heart’s tearing apart

My everything– it’s shattering

Why must I take precautions about unbeknownst conditions?

What is this curse that only seems to make me worse?

I do not understand this simple, shear lack of demand

To try to know just who I am and then giving a damn!

My soul is cold, is that the goal?
To make my mind a hole?

I “never smile” – it’s been a while, but don’t blame that on me.

It’s evident, you see, that if it were all up to me,

I’d choose only to be happy since I’ve got nothing to lose.

But also see that happiness won’t cure the loneliness

The feelings deep inside of me are ones I can confide in

While those outside may wonder what is happening inside

I “never smile”- since happiness and I don’t coincide!

Finished as of May 30, 2014

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